How To Be A Successful Woman, According To Stock Photography

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NY Mag’s blog The Cut has put together a series of photos culled from their stock image service using keywords like “working woman,” “empowered female” and “girl power.” The result is a little disheartening:

“Here at the Cut, we often need illustrations for stories about women, and sometimes we turn to stock photography to meet those needs…We know that stock photography is designed to trade in cliches; but after searching for working woman and turning up umpteen images of multi-ethnic women examining X-rays, we realized that the world of stock-photo tropes is richer and weirder than we had imagined. If this is how feminism looks to the world, maybe what a woman really needs is a stock agency of one’s own.”

Apparently this is how to be a successful woman in today’s working world:

First, equip yourself with a set of red boxing gloves while wearing, of course, business attire

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Grow a few more sets of arms to carry the things you’ll need, like really large calculators and a small globe

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Don’t forget to review those X-Rays

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All of them.

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I’m serious.

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You’re going to need a folder to put those X-Rays in:

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Or a bunch of them

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ALL THE FOLDERS

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And just climb up the ones that don’t fit, and then a mountain after that

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Climb some more

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Keep climbing…stockwomen_fullym_004

And in case the metaphor wasn’t obvious:

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And then collapse all over the damn place because you’ve been doing all that climbing

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Don’t worry though you made it

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And while things look good up here…

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It’s now time to take on the real problem. These tools might look useful…

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…but they’re not womanly enough. So use that saw to do your nails (those mountains!) because of course that’s how it’s done

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And because they need to look good when you’re stomping all those men with your heels

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Success.

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Any questions?

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